I recently came across a post that I so wish I would have found back when it was written in 2011, at the beginning of our adoption journey. It asks a lot of tough “are you ready” questions that indeed, we were not ready for.
Now, we are where we are by the grace of God, living out what He ordains for our good and His glory. I don’t know what would have happened if we had been more educated four years ago; I do know that God put these particular kids in our particular family at that particular time, and we trust that He is good. Still, we would have known some tough questions to ask our adoption agency regarding our children, and we would have known that where we are four years later is not unexpected but is a common trajectory for older child adoptions. I think we would have pushed back harder when our agency said “just give it time” and demanded intensive intervention for Vernon in the early stages of adoptive family life.
If you are even considering adopting, read this post linked below from Marty’s Musings. Then read it again. Then pray like crazy, for a long time, and read it again. By all means, ADOPT, but do so in an informed way.
Our family is dealing with very nearly all of the “are you ready” questions presented in the post, and I never expected to do so. It’s crazy exhausting, y’all. It’s hard for us, and it’s hard for our kids.
So now, I leave you with this invaluable post: To Prospective Foster/Adopt Parents